Shadows
by Missmarauder13
Summary: Not so many people have heard of me. You must have heard of my brother. Who hasn't. But I'm nothing like him. This is my own life...my untold stroy.A side fic to Curse of the wolf, about what happened to little Rachel Lupin and her life through her eyes.
1. Untold Story of Rachel L Lupin

Author's Note: Hello! I know I haven't updated in a while. VERY SORRY! High school is taking up my writing time. Lots of homework! I took down most of the chapters. I plan to write a better story for Rachel Lupin and finish _Curse of the Wolf_ first. So hang on! This chapter is a little bit different than the original. Thanks! Enjoy.

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I really don't remember the days at 12 Lunar Drive when I was little. I was only two when "the bite" happened to my brother. When everything turned upside down.There are few things I do remember: my mother's salty tears because she cried a lot and she held me when she was upset. She hugged me for comfort. She didn't want me to go away like Daddy or get hurt like my brother. It was like I was her doll to cry on. 

Thinking back on it I don't mind. Her soft hands touching my hair and caressing my cheek and I wipe the tears away from her beautiful face. I also recall these strange men taking me away from her. There were also more tears in her eyes and she was yelling at the men for taking me. Her yells sounded like she was in pain which she was. They took away her baby which was one of the few things left she had.

Years later I found out it was the Disposal of Magical Creatures people who came to the door at 12 Lunar Drive told my mum to make a choice. I remember some parts of the conversation. What they did was illegal also...that I also discovered when I was older.

"It's either the girl or the werewolf, pick." One of the men told my mum with so much joy. How could she though, she loved us both equally. She didn't want these men to take Remus since she knew they would injure him badly or even kill him and she didn't want them to take me either.

"You can't take children like that!" mum yelled at the men.

But they took me away so easily. They grabbed my arm and I made it too easy for those strange men. I was so vulnerable when I was younger.Mum was probably too shocked by what they were telling her. I don't blame her even till this day.

You're probably wondering who I am. Not so many people heard of me. You must have heard of my brother. Who hasn't? Most people think I'm dead. Others think I killed myself from depression. Well those stories are wrong. My name is Rachel Lupin and this is my untold story.

Author's Note: It's a little bit different. I promise to write as soon as I can.


	2. Shadows

Author's Note: Here's chapter two. Enjoy!

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Theythrew me in a dark cold room with a tiny window thathad no light shining through.It was scary.I hated the dark and shadows so I cried a lot. Icried myself to sleep at night and wished I would die. There was a voice that I heared almost every night in my dreams, telling me to keep going and to believe. The voice sounded like a boy's voice not that much older than me. MaybeI wasgoing crazy. I had no idea who the boy was who was talking to me in my dreams but I tried to listen to him anyway.

The strange people took me out eventually out of that room since they were annoyed by my cries and moans. They wanted to shut me up.I think the darkness and the shadows consumed me in sadness and sorrow. I started to think pessimistically and lost all hope from seeing my family again. Not even the morning sun cheered me up.

I probably ruined these strange men's plan. They really wanted to take my brother away instead of me because they would have probably killed him 'cause that's what they do. They wereso heartless they would of killed a four year old harmless boy who happened to be damned because of a werewolf bite. Still are, who ever is left alive out of all of them. They had no idea what to do with me. They could kill a werewolf without getting in trouble but not a normal little girl.

I stayed sedentary in corner for awhile in one of the strange men's office at the Ministry. I was hidden so the people who didn't know had no idea there was a little girl being toutured.I wanted to run away or starve myself. I was probably there at the Ministry for more than a year. I was aboutthree and a half by this time.

Finally the man who's office I was sitting in the corner of for so long came up to me and gave me a piece of paper. The handwriting was loopy and I couldn't read yet.

"Keep this paper," he said smoothly. "It will explain everything when you're older. You're name isRachel Lupin,'' he told me. Even to this day it surprises me that this man decided to help. He wasn't one of the men who took me but I assumed he was their boss or ring leader who told them to do so.

I was quiet for awhile. I haven't spoken to anyone since I was there and I was afraid I couldn't speak anymore.

"Why?" That was the only thing that came out of my mouth. My throat was dry.

"Run away," the man said to me. "I'll cover up for you."

I didn't know if I should of trust him. Who was that guy and why did he coaxed me into running away. I took the paper from him and put it into the pocket of my floral dress. I hesitated about running away. He gave a me a backpack full of clothes, food, a pillow and a blanket.

I escaped from the clutches of the horrible menwhen I was four and started a new life.

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Author's Note: Please review! 


	3. Somebody Get Me Out of Here

Author's Note: Hey sorry for the delay. Finals aren't fun. If you read the original fic "Into the Shadows" before I took all the chapters down this happens to be different than the original chapter 3. Some names have been swtiched and importance on some characters (you'll know what I mean.) Enjoy!

updated a/n: Hi. I looked over this and the names are messed up sorry. And some stuff isn't suppose to be in here. It was from the old version of this. So yeah.

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I was wondering aimlessly in a city where there were many people on the street and a mixture of disgusting smells like liquor and smoke filled the atmosphere. It was hard to find shelter from day to day. I lived in alleys, hid in abandon buildings and hung out on the streets. I stole food so I could live, from stores, but never got caught. Once in a while people would give me money so I can get a decent meal. They didn't do it out of kindness; they did it out of pity. I remember seeing it in their eyes and how I hated to see that look on people's faces when they looked at me. I never wanted pity and still don't. 

One day after pilfering bread and an apple from a store when I was six, a person walked by me. It happened to be a nun. There was a church near by and they had orphanage. I saw the children play on the playground everyday, laughing. I was never jealous that they had a better life than me. I didn't like idea of being trapped in a certain spot.

I looked down so the nun didn't realize that I knew she was there. I took a bite out of my apple and then the lady asked me something.

"Where are your mother and father?" I had no clue so I looked down at the floor again. My backpack still on my back and my hair was tangled and my dress looked like a rag. It was raining and I was shivering.

"I don't know where they are," I admitted in a soft voice. It was about time I gave in. I really needed some help and I was too stubborn to ask. If I didn't admit I needed help then I would've probably died. Even now I'm too stubborn to ask for advice from anyone.

Before I knew it I was in room at the church with many beds and children playing inside. The children stared at me like I was an alien from another planet. I kind of was, thinking about it. I lived on the streets and they always had a place to go to when it rained. The nun gave me some new clothes to wear because mine were wet from the rain. I took a shower and combed my hair. I washed away all the dirt and sorrow from the streets.

"HI!" I girl about my age gave me a warm greeting. Her blonde curls bounced when she walked over to me. She was shorter than me and herhazel eyes shined on such a cloudy day.

"Hello," I said quietly.

"Who are you?" she asked me.

"Rachel," I replied. "Rachel Lupin." Those words fell out so gradually.

"I'm Jessica," the blonde girl said.

"How long have you been here?" I asked Jessica.

"Pretty much all my life," she replied. "I've seen you on the streets stealing food from the shops. How do you do that?" she sounded awed by my actions yet sounding like a mother scolding her child at the same time.

"I dunno," In beginning when I started to steal I was nervous and took precautions, then after the third time I didn't even realize what I was doing. It was part of my life. I wondered too.

"I'll introduce you to some people." Jessica walked over to the group of people who were staring at me when I walked in. I followed her still taking in the scenery around me.

"This is Rachel," Jessica told her group of friends.

"That's the girl who we see on the streets all the time?"

"YesTara that's her," Jessica sighed.

"I'm Tara," said a girl with wavy blonde hair who was playing cards with a boy.

"Hi," I said again. I noticed a lonely girl in a corner. She was sitting there; her knees up to chin and tears were in her gray eyes. She had light brown hair like me and was holding a rag doll in her arms. "Who's that girl over there?" I asked Jessica.

"Oh her..." complained Jessica.

"Her name is Suzanne." explained Tara. "She's a little..."

"Strange," Jessica finished Tara's sentence.

"What could be strange about her?" I asked them

They shrugged their shoulders.

The boy who was playing cards with Tara asked me to play with them after they were done. I said no and walked over to my bed.

I took that paper that the strange man gave me a long time ago and stared at it. I couldn't read yet and I didn't trust these people to tell me my past. I sighed and put it back into the backpack and walked over to Suzanne.

"Hi," I said calmly.

The girl sniffled and wiped her eyes. "What do you what?" she asked me annoyed by my kind attempt to be friendly. "Are you going to pick on me like the others?"

Suzanne was my age, clarified by Jessica but looked like she was four years old. She was still holding the rag doll close to her.

"No, not at all." I replied. "Why would I pick on you?"

"Everyone does," she said

"I'm Rachel," I introduced myself trying to change the subject.

"Hi. I'm Suzanne."

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We were outside in the playground one day at noon. I was seven at the time and I walked by the fence and looked beyond the barrier keeping me in. I was glad I didn't have to worry about food or shelter. But this wasn't the life I wanted to live. I finally had friends though. Suzanne actually became a really good friend of mine but Jessica still didn't approve of her. 

"Hey," Suzanne walked over to me.

"Hi," I said grimly.

"What wrong?" she asked me curious of my troubles.

"I wish I wasn't here." I replied. "I don't belong here."

"You right," Suzanne immediately said after my comment. "You're different from us and always will be. You have a family out there who still loves you. We don't." I figured out that she read the letter that I hid so carefully in my backpack that I still didn't want to read yet.

"You read the letter." I croaked.

"Yes," she replied. "Sorry," she added hastily.

There was a long pause and then I said rapidly "I'm leaving this place."

"When?"

"Tonight," I replied. This was a random thought that came into my mind. My instincts told me I should leave.

"I'm coming with you," Suzanne said suddenly.

"Maybe you shouldn't." I replied trying not to sound mean. "You have a chance of being adopted."

"No I don't," she replied stubbornly. I had a feeling we wouldn't get anywhere in this conversation. We were both very stubborn people.

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That night I took some food from the kitchen, packed my clothes and made sure that piece of paper was still in my backpack. I looked over at the bedSuzanne was peacefully sleeping in clutching that rag doll close to her. 

"Bye," It was barely a whisper. I felt sorry for leaving Suzanne, practically alone.

I was quiet through the hallways hoping none of the nuns would catch me. I tried my best to be to not make a sound. To pretend I was ghost was a very easy thing to do. I muttered a payer under my breath hoping I could see my family again.

When I reached outside I sighed in relief for not getting caught. I ran away like the wind from the city with the disgusting smells and sorrows and continued on. Wandering aimlessly again.

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Author's Note: Review please! I got rid of some people and changed it around a bit. 


	4. The Spark In The Shadows

Author's Note: Hi! Enjoy. This chapter is almost the same as the original but for the people who never read this chapter before this is new I guess.

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I passed through a town that was the complete opposite to the town that the orphanage was in. There was no smoke that filled the air and no liquor aroma. The sky was blue all the time and the lives of the townspeople werecalm and peaceful. It gave me some hope that this might be the town my family lived in or any sort of clue. I was on the streets... again but this time it was different. I was the only person so people noticed me more. In the town before I sometimes saw creepy men and women in boxes, but here it was different. Steeling food was uncommon here and I learned that the hard way. 

I took some chocolate and bread that I would finish in less than a day. It was snowing and I was freezing to death. I stole from this store before, but it always seemed too easy. I took precautions here. I took a large bite of the chocolate bar (oh it was soooooooo good by the way), but I felt someone grabbing my wrist tightly. I turned around slowly and what I found was an angry shop owner that was red with anger.

I stared at him in pure horror. I never got caught before.

"You filth, you've been stealing from my shop for days!" he yelled at me.

"I'm sorry,'' I moaned. A bunch of people came over to the shop and chatter started.

"Sorry isn't enough you little bitch." He hit my arm with such force I cried in pain.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Now tears were coming from my eyes. That man was evil. Some people in world are so cruel and so stubborn that they would hurt a little girl. He hit my arm again, but this time I screamed.

"Stop hurting her Ben!" yelled a woman. She walked into the middle of the circle. I was on the snowy, white ground crying in pain.

"Why should I?" He said coolly.

"She doesn't deserve it." replied the woman. Her hands were on her hips. She must have been in her early thirties but when I was seven years old I thought all adults were old. She had short brown hair and beautiful brown eyes.She bent down to see if I was ok.

"Are you ok?" she asked me in a motherly tone.

I looked into her dark brown eyes and nodded my head. I wiped my tears away from my own eyes.

She saw by how I looked that I was a loner. It was a life that was broken, and damned; an orphan's life.

"Come with me." She said. I followed her away from the store and the crowd of people. We were at the door of a small bookshop.

We walked into the bookshop. It looked like a quaint shop but it was big with many books on the shelves. There was a staircase leading to a door.

"Would you like to stay with me?" the lady asked me.

"Sure," I replied immediately. What did I have to lose? Not much.

"What's your name?" she put her coat in the desk and locked the door leading to the book shop.

"Rachel,"

"Alyssa," she smiled at me. I tried to smile back.

She motioned near the staircase and I followed to the door. It led to a room with many other doors where Alyssa lived.

"This is your room," she opened a door to a small room where there was a bed in the middle and a dresser on the side. "My room is next door." I put my backpack down and laid down on the bed. I closed my eyes and couldn't believe how nice it felt to be on a bed when I'd been lying down on the cold snowy, ground.

"Thanks," I sighed and wanted to fall asleep.

"Let's go into town tomorrow," Alyssa's voice was still soft and motherly. "We need to buy you some things. I can't believe you don't have a coat. You must be freezing. Good night."

For the first time in a long while I feel asleep peacefully._

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_

I woke up early, smelling at wonderful taste. I walked to the small kitchen finding Alyssa in a bath robe and fuzzy slippers making pancakes. She was humming a song under her breath

"Good morning," she said joyfully.

"Hi," I said. I

"How's was your night?" she asked me.

"Wonderful," I said. "Those pancakes look great," they were chocolate chip pancakes. I ate them very fast. "Yum,"

"I'm glad you like them," she said hapily.

"Do you think you could teach me how to read?" I asked her suddenly. I was seven and I should of known by now how to. I also wanted to read that letter so badly.

"Ok, I thought you already knew. I'll teach you how to write too." She replied.

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After breakfast we went into the small shops in town. The shop windows were all ready for Christmas. There were toy trains, nutcrackers, and spinning doll ballerinas in window of the shop we went to. Alyssa bought me a warm fuzzy blue coat. She also bought me some nice shoes and a couple of outfits. I didn't have any shoes because from all that walking the shoes gave me blisters so i got rid of my old shoes. She treated me like the mother I wanted and I was the daughter she wished she had. 

"You look lovely," she smiled at me when I was in one of my new outfits.

"Can we go back to the book shop?" I asked impationaly.

"You really want to learn." Alyssa remarked, surprised. She probably nver met a child that was so eager to learn.

We walked into the book shop. There was a couch near the many book shelves. Alyssa put her coat on the desk where the cash register was, locked the bookshop doorand picked up at book at jumped onto the couch. I followed her.

"It takes awhile at first," she warned me. "So don't get frustrated."

"I'm a quick learner," I bragged. She saw the glint in my eyes that I didn't mean to boast.

"Will see," she grinned.

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Author's Note: I had no idea where to draw the line and say this is the end of the chapter. Please review! 

**Next chapter:** A week later: (Rachel knows how to read and write now. She's a quick learner...) Rachel tells Alyssa about the letter and finally discovers the past she been procrastinating on.


	5. In Another Life

**Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews:is greatful: Enjoy the next chapter.**

ABOUT THE YEARS: Between Remus and Rachel there is a two year age difference. On Harry Potter Lexicon the say Remus was born in 1959 so Rachel would have to born in 1961 if that's true.

Disclaimer: I don't own the magic world, Harry Potter and sadly, don't own Remus Lupin. If I owned Remus Lupin.. well no comment.We can't get everything in life.

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Alyssa was closing up the store for the day. The last customer left and she was checking if all the money was in the cash register. I was on the couch near the tall bookshelves reading. It was about a mermaid who fell in love with a prince and wanted to walk on land like a human. 

I put my hand in my jeans pocket and felt the mysterious letter in my hands. I decided I wanted to tell Alyssa about it. There was just one problem... how would I tell her? Even though it had only been a week since I'd known her I felt like she would be the most trustful to talk to and was the closest person to a mother.

"Alyssa," I called anxiously.

"Yes," she replied, sitting next to me. Her voice still was caring and soft. She was wearing a strange looking robe and had black framed reading glasses on.

"I..." I was stumbling on my words, wondering how to explain it to her. It had been so long and now I only remembered the man's voice coaxing me into escaping and giving me the letter. That's all.

"What is it?" she asked in concern.

I took out the piece of paper and unfolded it. It read:

_Rachel Lavender Lupin_

_Born on: August 26th, 1961_

_Parents: Diana and John (divorced)_

_Siblings: Remus John Lupin (Born on March 15th 1959)_

_Cousin: Romulus_

_Type of witch: half blood_

_Twelve Lunar Drive_

Alyssa was staring at the paper and kept reading it over and over again. We sat in silence for a while. She stared at me and gave a long sigh.

"It doesn't give the town where your parents live. I've never heard of Twelve Lunar Drive," said Alyssa. "You have an older brother and you're seven... I wish I can help you. Who gave you this?"

"Some man," I replied quietly. I couldn't believe I had a family out there. But where was twelve Lunar Drive?

Alyssa looked expressionless.

"You're a half blood," she said finally after another awkward silence moment.

"What's that?" I pondered. I had no idea what a half blood was when I was younger.

"You come from a wizarding family," Alyssa replied simply.

"Magic!" I exclaimed. Usually little kids read about magic that refer to witches: with green faces and big warts on their noses and are evil.

"Yes magic," she said coolly. "but not the type of witches and wizards in that book I read to you. Muggles make big mistakes thinking a witch is an ugly hag." Alyssa laughed and took out something that looked like a long twig branch. "This is a wand," she did a movement with the stick that made the paper float in the air.

"Cool," I complimented Alyssa. "So you're saying I'm a witch?" I asked nervously.

"Yes," she replied calmly. "Did you ever do anything strange or unusual you couldn't explain?"

"Actually yes," I replied. "It was at the orphanage I stayed in. I was playing with one of my friends and all of a sudden the toys started to move by themselves,"

"You definitely have some magic in you," she grinned.

"Strange," I mumbled. I looked down at the floor with a rush of sadness. I wanted to cry but I always kept my emotions in. Now that I knew who my family was there was no way to find them. I was on the verge of tears.

Alyssa embraced me. "Everything's gonna be ok," she stroked my light brown hair and wiped the tears from my face.

"I'm sorry," I said without control.

"You have nothing to say sorry about," Alyssa said and embraced me tighter.

"Ok," I said through my hiccups.

"That's a pretty middle name you have... Lavender," Alyssa tried to distract me from my sadness. It kind of worked... not really.

"Thanks," I sniffled.

"Do you want to go out for ice cream?"

My sprit lifted quickly. Not thinking about my family or my unknown past I got up from the couch and put on my coat. Now that distracted me from my sadness!

"Hold on," Alyssa grabbed her coat. "How did I know ice cream would make you feel better," she laughed to herself.

I laughed along with her. At that moment, it felt like Alyssa was my mum. I found a hand to hold and left the shadows. The life in the orphanage, the life in the Ministry felt so distant, like it was another life. I was living in a new day and finally found my place. What could go wrong?

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Author's Note: Please review. Enjoy these sweet, happy chapters while you can. There only one or two more that are like this. :hint hint: 


	6. Sliver Bells

Author's Note: Before I talk about flames I would like to point out the chapter that's titled Somebody Get Me Out of Here has been edited. I didn't notice the mistakes of peoples' names and I got rid of a few people since they were bothering me. So yes check that out. OK flames. Oh yes them. Don't flame. Don't be evil. If you hate or dislike a fic dont' bother to review at all. If you hate it so much you are only wasting time writing a review. Respect other authors. And yes I'm a girl...to answer that person's flame. Whoever you are. Thanks for the reviews...the reviews that weren't fames that is. Enjoy this lovely chapter about Christmas.

Enjoy!

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I woke up before the sunrise, excited. It was Christmas Day and knew this Christmas would be different than all the others. Usually I would freezing to death from the cold snow and forgot about how Christmas was supposed to be a jolly, happy holiday. Lying in dirty snow crying my sorrows away and seeing happy families in a warm, joyous houses not realizing that they're so people who don't have that and the simple things people take granted for. 

I ran into Alyssa's room and bounced on her bed.

"What the…" she was still half asleep and very startled by my wake up call.

I gave a soft giggle, the laugh I haven't heard in ages and said, "Come on we gotta go see if Santa came," I pulled her arm trying to get her out of bed. When she gave in she put on her fuzzy slippers and left the warm blankets.

Even though I was seven and went though a lot of hell I still believed there was a Santa. I always believed the impossible after the shadows stopped haunting me. I think if I didn't believe in the impossible, I would've gone mad.

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I dashed downstairs to find the Christmas tree decorated with ornaments and an angel at the top. There were gifts all different Christmas wrapping paper with a gold color ribbon on each one of them. I saw Alyssa's face glow too at the sight like I did. She was happy to see my face glow. 

"Presents!" I exclaimed and ran over to the tree.

"This one's from me," Alyssa handed me a rectangle box.

As any child of that age I stripped off the wrapping paper at record speed.

It was a gift almost ever girl wants or has already; a doll. She had brown hair like I did but bright blue eyes. The outfit she was wearing was a pink dress with a lace bow on the side.

"She's beautiful," I hugged Alyssa tightly. "Thank you," I handed Alyssa a small box which was my present to her.

"It's lovely," she told me and put the beaded necklace on that I made for her. Ok, it wasn't really that lovely but it was the thought that counts that mattered.

I opened my other presents from "Santa" which wasn't a lot, but I had nothing to complain about. Alyssa had a couple of presents under the tree from her friends who gave gifts to each other every year.

"Wow," I whispered as I opened my final gift. It was a dress similar to the outfit to the doll (that I named Elizabeth) Alyssa gave me. The same color pink and that pretty lace bow…

"I have another surprise for you," Alyssa said. "Well it's not really a surprise but here it goes. My family_ always _invites me to a Christmas Day party and I always say no. This year I have to go, sadly. I can call one of my friends that you met to baby sit you or you can come with me,"

Of course Alyssa knew the choice I made. Duh! I went with her to the party. I put on my new pink dress. I didn't understand why Alyssa was so reluctant to go see her family on Christmas. She should have been thankful to have a family, but then I realized why she always refused to go when her mother answered the door.

"Alyssa," her mother sounded surprise to see her and yet there was disappointment in her tone. We both walked into the hall and I was amazed by how flashy and rich looking it was compared to Alyssa's apartment which was cozy but simple. "Who are you?" she asked me in a sweet phony tone like she was talking to a two year old.

"She's my daughter," Alyssa replied. We followed her mom into the kitchen where she was making lunch for the guests. "Her name is Rachel," she gave me a warm smile similar to the one she gave me the first time I met her.

"Oh," her mother seemed to be taken aback. "I never knew you got pregnant," It seemed like they haven't seen each other in a long time. Something was up.

Alyssa tried to stay cool but I saw the expression on her face that meant she was so pissed off. "I wasn't pregnant mum," she paused. "I'm not like my sister who's a freakin whore who sleeps with all of her boyfriends." The tone was bitter and evil… very unlike Alyssa. "I adopted her," she said with dignity.

I started to smile. Since when was it that I was daughter? It felt very good.

"Really, well that's great," her mother sounded unsure. "Go into the living room. I'll be there in a minute. The family is in there,"

I followed Alyssa into a perfume fragrance room where people were taking loudly and having a good time. We both sat on a sofa and taking the little appetizers the waiter guys were giving out to every body.

"What's a whore?" I asked Alyssa.

"I'll tell you when you're older," she replied taking a large bite into the chicken.

"When will that be?" i asked. "I want to know," complaining like a three year old always helps to get the things you want.

"You really don't want to know. WhenI do tell you'll regret it. Well I won't tell you but it's something bad and you shouldn't be one,"

"So I'm your daughter now," I grinned, changing the subject.

"It would've been hard to explain to my mother because of what a cold person she is how I really met you so I said I adopted you. Even if we didn't come today I was going to tell you that I think you should call me mum. You don't have plans to runaway right?" she asked. "I would it if you were my daughter,"

"I don't have any plans," I replied, imagining the future I would have with a mum. My life would finally go the way I wanted it to for so long. "I'm planning to stay mum," Alyssa gave me a warm, motherly hug as snowflakes outside fell down from sky.

"_I knew it," I thought. "This Christmas was different. A miracle came true," _

Author's Note: Please review. I love this chapter for some reason. I find it cute and a bit innocent. So review...no flames but review and make me happy. Adios.


	7. Say Goodbye

Author's Note: Here's the next chapter. Thanks to the people who reviewed. You get chocolate! I love you guys (in a author-reviewer way...). Enjoy this chapter. Well try to. This was a bit hard to write. The chapter before was so nice and happy. Enjoy anways.

Disclaimer (because I think there should be one): I don't own much. I own Rachel Lavender Lupin and all the original characters. None of these characters are based on real people. They were created in my head one night. That's all.

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I was walking home from school one day when my life changed so terribly. I was ten and living a very nice life with my new mother. With my luck though, I knew this life wouldn't last. 

Alyssa started to teach me some charms, hexes and spells around that age.I don't think it's legal to teach a ten year old things that a student learns in their third or second year at Hogwarts. Oh well. I didn't even now what Hogwarts was until Alyssa explained it to me. She went there when she was younger. We went to Diagon Alley one day and she bought me a wand.

It was amazing what sometimes Alyssa did with that wand. I figured out one day by asking one of her friends what she was like when she was younger. Her friend, Kayla told me that Alyssa was a book freak and got high scores on all of her tests. I wasn't very good though at the stuff Alyssa taught me though, but I tried.

I carried the wand everywhere I went. Even in school, but Alysaa told me not to take it out because of the muggles. She explained what that meant and that she (and I) are probably the only witches in town. Alyssa liked the muggle world and her simple life owning a book shop.

I was almost at the book shop when I saw smoke ruining the blue sky's color. It was a beautiful day. It was around the area Alyssa's book shop was.

_"Oh no,"_ I thought and ran towards the bookshop which was where the smoke was coming from.

My eyes widened, flames were out of the windows of the bookshop. The shop, my home was burning down in front of my eyes. I was praying that Alyssa wasn't in there since it looked like all the whole building was engrossed in flames and if people were in there they were trapped.

Firemen were already there and went into the building to see if anyone was in there. The fireman didn't come out of the building for a long time. I started to get nervous. I didn't want Alyssa to die.My eyes were filling up with tears of worry.

When the fireman came out of the flames he was carrying a unconscious Alyssa. I gave a yelp and ran over.

"Mum?" I croaked.

"I'll take her to the hospital," said Kayla, one of Alyssa's best friends who also ran over to the fireman. She also had a look of sadness and dried tears on her face. I met her before when Alyssa and I went to Diagon Alley.

Somehow Kayla managed to get Alyssa's body away from the muggles and took her to St. Mungo's, a wizard hospital.

Kayla and I were waiting outside on of the rooms in St. Mungo's. Kayla was pacing back and forth and I was counting all the tiles on the floor.

"Kayla, Rachel," the healer called us. "Ms. Reimer wants to see you,"

The two of us gasped to see the state Alyssa was in. Most of her body was covered in bandages and was deathly pale. There was blood in her hair and the healer told us she was burnedvery badly.

"Mum!" I was happy to see her again. I only wished this wouldn't be the last time I spoke to her.

"Rachel," her voice was softer than a whisper. It wasn't that patient, warm, loving voice. It was replaced with a ghost's voice that sounded weak and hoarse. Death was calling for her.

"Please," was the only thing I had to say to let Alyssa know what was on my mind.

"Don't be afraid," she said softly. "I'll miss you very much. I wish I could give you something but my possessions were destroyed,"

"Don't think like that!" I said in anger. "There might be some hope. When you're better--"

"Rachel," she said seriously. "I just don't have the strength,"

By this time I was crying hysterically. I had no idea what to say.

"You two have to go," the healer told us. "We have to perform some tests,"

"I love you," I told Alyssa. "I'll miss you everyday," My face was red and tears kept falling from my face. "I'll never forget you," I whispered wondering if she heard me.

"I love you too Rachel." she said. "I'll be watching up in heaven," I blew a kiss to her and she tried to smile.

That was the last time I saw her. It was painful for me to hear this- she couldn't make it- she died.

* * *

Author's Note :sniffle: I'm sorry this chapter was short. Even though Alyssa is fictional, I hate writing about people dying. Makes me sad. :sniffle: Please review. 


	8. Eyes Wide Open

**Author's Note:** Thank you sooo much for the reviews! I'm very thankful. :hugs all: I'll answer KRP's questions...

1) how did the fire start?

Hmm... it was a random bad fire. Alyssa could have been cooking... could be candles. Good question. Nobody knows.

2) how did she get that hurt? should've only been burnt, not exactly bleeding.

I should of explained that more. Rachel doesn't know what went on in the burning building. Since the building was up in flames, beams, and the building itself (stuff)were falling down. She could of gotten hit with something which could be life damaging. And to top it off she was badly burned. She just didn't have the strength to pull through.

3) was the fire an accident, or was someone out to get them?

No one was out to get them. Not yet :grins:

4) uhh...thanks for the chocolate? (ran out of questions :P)

You're welcome. Hopefully I answered your questions! Enjoy this chapter!

PS: I'm updating A LOT lately... making up for all the times I didn't AND I'm going away soon and want to update to a certain point.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own this magical world. I don't own Remus Lupin :sniffle: Suzanne, Jessica and Rachel Lupin are my characters though. There cool… but a little weird…just a little.

* * *

My heart was crushed to find out the news. 

"Why!" I yelled out loud, "Why!" The little scared two year old girl who was abused by the shadows and the darkness was back.

I felt the letter in my pocket… it was still there. I only had memories to remember Alyssa and nothing else, but I wished they burned up along with the shop and her possessions.

I had a rush of guilt. Maybe it was my fault, a sly voice in my head said. The voice was so believable so I gave in to it.

I knew I had to leave this town. Everything reminded me of her. She was the closest person to a mother that I was able to remember at that time.

* * *

I looked up in the sky wishing I could just leave this world. It was cruel to me and gave me grief and sorrow. Was it my fate to die with no one knowing? Or was it to be damned? 

I walked back to the burned book shop and where hope use to be bright. I just wanted to know if what was happening was real. I ran away from the town without looking back.

"_Now where am I gonna go_?" I asked myself. Grief was taking over me and all I wanted was find a place and shut myself from this world. To be alone.

"_Maybe back to the orphanage?"_ I another voice suggested.

It was out of the question. I missed Jessica and Suzanne a lot though, but it would also be painful to return there too. And where was the orphanage from here anyways? I had no sense of direction.

I sighed, knowing that my only choice was to wonder aimlessly again.

A blanket was wrapped around me to protect myself from the autumn wind. I found it in a trash can. I know, gross but useful. I somehow stumbled into a town that was the compete opposite of the town I lived in before. It showed no hope and promised broken dreams.

There were guys in the shadows of the alleys selling objects. The objects must have been illegal. I heard police sirens in the background shortly after I thought I heard a gunshot.

The people selling the strange item were in there own world, dazed, taken over by some force. They stared at me evilly like they had planned to do something with me. I quickly looked down and kept moving.

Across the street, two boys were in fight, and their groups of friends were rooting them on. One of the boys took out a knife

I gave a moan of fright,and ran into an alley, which was a stupid thing to do. It was dark and no one would be able to see me crying like a little girl. I leaned against the wall and gave a heavy sigh. I pulled the blanket closer to me.

I was sitting there for a while, thinking about where I should go next. I just remembered I had something else with me… a wand.

"Maybe that can help me!" I thought with joy and took it out.

I tried to do the charms Alyssa taught me, but no success. I wasn't focused to do them correctly. Drowned in sorrow.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and was afraid it was one of those boys who had come to kill me. I gave a yelp and turned around to meet death.

"Rachel?" but it wasn't who I thought it was. My eyes widened… it was Suzanne.

"Suzanne?" I asked unsure. I thought I was dreaming or having illusions like some crazy person. I stepped away from her.

"You shouldn't be alone in here," she warned.

"I know," I muttered

"Suzanne!" called another voice that sounded familiar. She ran to where we were and was out of breath. "Don't leave like that. You can get hurt. Then I'll be blamed." A girl who could have been Jessica, but it wasn't no, it couldn't of been.

"Rachel, is that you?" the girl said with surprise.

"Who are you?" I asked.

They both stared at me wondering what the hell was wrong with me.

"This is Suzanne," Jessica's tone sounded worried. She was probably concerned about my sanity.

"That can't be!" I exclaimed, still taking in the fact that Jessica is here and that she claims this is Suzanne. The little girl from the orphange.

"You're Rachel Lavender Lupin," Only Susanne and Alyssa knew my full name back then.

I nodded and felt the tiniest bit of hope.

"How did you both escape and how did you two become friends?"

"Well," Jessica sat down on the dirty ground, comfortable with her legs crossed. "I found out while we were on the run that my mum was a witch and that my dad was a muggle doctor." Jessica bragged.

"What does that have to do with the question Jessica?" Suzanne said with an impatient tone.

"But how did you become friends and why did you escape together? Don't you hate each other?" this was getting confusing.

"We escaped together but even when we were wondering we didn't talk. We really got on each other's nerves. But then we got caught," Suzanne sighed and glared at Jessica.

"It wasn't my fault. You weren't running quick enough,"

"Anyways, we took some food from this store and got caught and the owners called the authorities," explained Suzanne and Jessica gave a nervous laugh.

"We ended up in this home. There other kids, orphans too."

"There's a woman who takes care of us," said Suzanne calmly. Jessica snorted.

"What?"

"How can you say she takes care of us. She doesn't give--"

"Jessica, shut up ok?" Finally, Suzanne was able to stand up for herself.

Jessica obeyed and it became quiet.

"Do you think I can stay with you?" Even though the woman didn't seem nice I didn't really care. Shelter and decent food was all that I was hoping for.

"Sure, I don't see why not," replied Suzanne.

"I don't think she'll notice," said Jessica quietly.

We were walking towards Jessica and Suzanne's new home while Jessica was telling me about this boy they met in school. He was the same age but actually had a family.

"Is he nice?" I asked.

"Oh yeah Mark is really nice,"

"Maybe you can stay with him instead,"

"I highly doubt it," Jessica said darkly.

We were a block away from the house and I couldn't believe the neighborhood. The houses were small and the outside wasn't kept well. There were no fences, maybe some type of wall to separate houses but those had graffiti all over it. Three girls who looked about fourteen were in a car smoking and drinking liquor.

We finally arrived on Jessica's doorstep and the three of us just sat there and talked like any normal girls. If only we were just that.

"Come in," Jessica told me as she opened the door so I was able to see the living room. The living room, from what I could have seen of it was dark, but yet there was something or more like someone moving. There were sounds of enjoyment and pleasure in the living room too. I saw Jessica shaking her head ashamed and running into her room.

Suzanne looked a bit ashamed but followed Jessica and I followed her.

"Well this is home,"Suzanne sighed

I looked around at what she called home. I had a rush of missing Alyssa very much right now. In the small bedroom there were two old looking beds. The wall paper was falling off. There was barely any light in the room. Almost total darkness, which I hated.

"Well there only two beds. Usually someone else sleeps here too but I really don't think they're coming back." explained Suzanne. "You can sleep with either me or Jessica,"

The beds were big enough to share. I sat down on Suzanne's bed. I remember from the orphange Jessica kicks randomly when she's asleep.

"Well goodnight, I know it's bit early but I was up before dawn," complained Jessica.

"We'll try to explain more in the morning," said Suzanne, lying down right next to me. She fell asleep quickly, shutting out the noises from oustide. My eyes were wide open, still awake as the cresent moon was rising.

* * *

Author's Note: Please review! Sorry if the ending was a bit bad. What's gonna happen next? Well you'll see soon.Review please! 


	9. Tryin' to Find a Hand to Hold

Author's Note: Thanks for the lovely reviews! Have fun on vacation everyone! Whoo go us! Florida, California, out of the country!Camp is almost over :cries: Or by the time this gets up it will be over. So I'm sad. REALLYsad. Enjoy and review to make me happy please.

* * *

It was early morning and not even light out. The faded wall paper- peeling living room was dead quiet when I woke up. At first I had no clue where I was. It felt like some sort of dream. The wooden floor creaked while I walked over to the only window in the bedroom. I watched the sun rise. It was a beautiful sight in such a horrible setting around me.

"Hey," A soft tired voice said. It was Suzanne. She was wearing pajama pants and a large top.

"What day is it?" I asked quietly so I wouldn't wake Jessica up and walked away from the window. The blankets were all tangled so I folded those as neatly as possible.

"Monday," she replied. "Oh darn we have school," Suzanne moaned and went across the hall and into the bathroom.

"Jess, wake up," I shook her.

"What. Monday already," she said.

"Yeah. Suzanne's in the bathroom,"

"Good for her. I'm going back to sleep,"

I nudged her again. "Wake up,"

"Gahh. Alright."

I look through the drawers to find some clothes that might fit me. I just realized that the room was a mess, clothes were all over the place and some homework assignments were scattered on the floor. I saw the grades; most of them were Suzanne's, they were low, which surprised me. I knew Suzanne was smart and very shy.

I found an outfit that I thought looked ok. It was an old pair of jeans and a purple top. I put the letter in the jean pocket. I'm not sure why, but it gave me some type of comfort.

"You can go in now. Hurry before the other kids get it," I never actually saw the other kids since the two of them stayed as far away as possible from the others. Suzanne walked out of the bathroom. She was all dressed too, a pink top and baggy black pants. I realized how thin she became and the bruises on her arm. I looked at her with concern.

"I'm such a klutz," she replied and figured out what I was thinking. "I bump into everything."

I nodded my head agreeing, but looking back it was probably something more.

In the bathroom I looked into the mirror that had a big crack in it going diagonally. It felt like it had been so long since I used a bathroom. My dark brown hair was tangled and there was still dirt on my face. I sighed and I probably took longer than Suzanne did.

* * *

Suzanne and I met up with Jessica and Mark. He was a nice looking boy with dark hair, brown eyes and was very tall. 

"This is Rachel. Rachel, Mark," Jessica said.

"Nice to meet you," I said. I felt something I never felt before inside me. I knew I was very, very shy back then (almost antisocial,), but this feeling was different. I ignored it and walked into the gray building that was the school around here.

"It looks…" I started to say

"It's a prison, I swear it is," said Suzanne bitterly.

"Come on Susanne, school's not that bad," Jessica said. "It could be worse,"

Mark nodded his head in agreement.

"How do you know Jessica and Suzanne?" I asked him curiously.

"They're in all my classes and somehow Molly knows my dad," he replied. I gave him a quizzical look. Oh just so you know, Molly was the woman "taking care of us." Never had good experiences with Mollies let's just say.

"Don't ask," he didn't really want to talk about it.

The three of them walked to their first class while I had to go to the office. I sat down in one of the red chairs. They were terribly uncomfortable and waiting for someone to ask why I was here.

"Hello, are you waiting for someone?" theladyasked.

"I'm new here," I said. "My name is Rachel Jones," Ok I lied about my name.I still felt like I was running from something. After I said the name, it sounded so fake "I'm ten years old," I couldn't believeshe believed me! I would think that they would want to see a parental guardian but no, they didn't care at all.

"Ok," she was writing something down and gave me a room number. "Go to this room for your new teacher," she smiled at me. "It's down the second hallway to your left,"

I nodded a thanks and left to look for the room. It was down a long hallway but it was the third room so I didn't have to walk far. Jessica, Mark and Suzanne waved when I walked in.

"Who are you?" the teacher asked. I noticed the classroom was almost full and very few desks left to sit it.

"I'm Rachel Jones. I just moved here," I told the teacher quietly.

"Class," the teacher said. She looked a little bit older than Alyssa, her hair was dark. "This is Rachel," I walked over where Jessica was and sat next to her.

"Her name is Mrs. Ferrara," whispered Jessica.

"I think she's nice," said Mark also whispering while Mrs. Ferrara continued with her lesson. Whatever that was. I wasn't paying attention.

"What do you mean she's nice! She's evil," Suzanne whispered back coldly.

"I heard that Suzanne," Mrs. Ferrara said while writing spelling words on the board and writing a page number where the story was in this large book under our desks. "Do you think you can start off where we were up to yesterday Suzanne on page 20?"

Kids started to whisper and laugh quietly. Suzanne blushed a color like the red seat I was sitting in at the main office. She shook her head no. "No thank you," she said less than a whisper.

"Can you even read?" a girl a couple of rows a head of us turned around and asked Suzanne that cruelly. "You _are_ stupid,"

"I can so read," said Suzanne angrily. Her tone was very harsh.

"Yeah right," the girl said and turned around.

"Come on Suzanne. I don't want to write home to your parents," said the teacher.

Suzanne was hold back tears from that comment. There was no one to write to, which upsetted her deeply. She nodded her head and opened the book. I gave Susanne a sympathetic look like I did when I was younger. There was laughter in the background while Suzanne was trying to get the words right. To me this made no sense. Suzanne was smart, then why was she having trouble. Eventually she struggled through a couple of paragraphs. Mrs. Ferrara didn't even stop the laughter going on. No wonder she thought school looked liked a prison and moaned when she realized it was Monday.

By now she was all red and crying from embarrassment.

I saw the Suzanne I left at the orphanage: the little girl with her rag doll crying wanting someone to comfort her. I thought she changed but she was still there.

* * *

Author's Note: Review please. Sorry if it's short! Have great vacations everyone! Be back on August 28th! 


	10. Endless Summer

Author's Note: I'm back from California! It was sooo much fun! Thanks for the reviews!

Thanks **amythestpony** for reviewing ... I never got the comment "spicy" before but I'm flattered. I like chicken too and yay magical brownies!

Thanks **ckontowderdon32** for reviewing. Yes I was sad for Suzanne too. Hugs for SUZANNE!

**The Demon Inside****-** Squee! Thanks!

Hope you enjoy this chapter. Finally something good is happening to Rachel Lupin…

* * *

I was so relieved when school was out and when summer rolled by. It was the summer that I would turn eleven. Mark and Jessica were eleven already in April. Suzanne would turn eleven in July and I would in August. Mark's parents were always away so we mostly hung out at his place. But why were they always away and left their kids? Shouldn't they be happy to have a family and stay with them? I didn't understand then because all I wanted was a family. Even if you belong in one not everything is all good and sunshine. 

Most of the time we would play with Mark's five year old brother Harrison or watch something called a TV. It was amazing how all those people were able to into such a small box. I asked Mark how did the TV worked. Later on I found out his mother was a witch and his dad a muggle. It explains the random muggle stuff.

I was surprised he replied since it was such a stupid question for a ten year old to ask. "Electricity and wires and other things. What you actually thought they're people who can fit in the TV?"

"No," I said embarrassed now by what I was thinking. I know he didn't mean to sound mean or anything.

The little boy Harrison always looked scared though but had the same beautiful dark eyes as Mark. Did I just say that…no, no, excuse me that didn't sound right. Sorry. Fine I'll tell. I did have feelings for Mark at one point in my life. I just thought it was some stupid little girl's crush that I would get out of. I kept saying that for so long and I know you're all laughing. Thinking back yes, it's freaking hysterical.

One of the greatest things that happened in my life was after Suzanne's birthday. We were at steps of "our home" and the three of us were convincing Jessica to come inside. She didn't want to. She was planning to run away. Well it wasn't such a happy moment at first. We we're actually fighting over something pointless.

"You can't leave you know that," Suzanne pointed out quietly.

"If my parents find out I'm hiding one of friends, they'll…" Mark started to say.

"It's not so bad. Why not try to talk to Molly..." I suggested

"Greatest idea you have!" Jessica exclaimed in sarcasm. She laughed bitterly. "She would never listen to me…"

Suzanne suggested something else but I wasn't paying attention. My eyes were up in the sky. I thought I saw an owl. Take that back I DID see an owl.

"Look up there!" I said randomly.

"What," my three friends said in unison and turned around to see me.

"Didn't you see them?" I asked. "I saw an owl,"

"Owls don't live here," Suzanne said. She looked to Jessica. "Do they?"

"No," Jessica said, still a little bit annoyed. At least she cooled down a bit.

"I never saw any owls here Rachel," Mark said nicely.

"But I did!" I said. They didn't believe and looked at me like I was crazy. Well that wasn't the first time people thought that.

"Well then you're going crazy," Jessica said in her moody tone.

"Am not," I replied,sticking my tongue out. Jessica and I continued going at each other like that for a while. You could see how mature we were.

There was a sound like someone was behind us. The four of us turned around to find four letters on the step behind us.

_Miss R. Lupin _

_The doorstep of Ms. M. Bell_

_24 Pasadena Road _

* * *

_Miss S. Adams _

_The doorstep of Ms. M Bell_

_24 Pasadena Road_

* * *

_Miss J. Frank_

_The doorstep of Ms. M. Bell_

_24 Pasadena Road_

* * *

_Mr. M. Mason _

_The doorstep of Ms. Bell_

_24 Pasadena Road_

* * *

I opened the letter with excitement and slightly nervous. I had no clue who was writing to me or the heck this was. What was a Hogwarts? I thought. 

**_Hogwarts School _**

_**Of Witchcraft and Wizardry**_

_Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore_

_Dear Miss Lupin, _

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. _

_Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later then July 31…_

I looked up from the letter to see that my friends already finished reading it. Susanne had a big smile on her face and Jessica seemed calmer.

"I can't believe it," Susanne said amazed.

"Yeah. Are you sure it isn't a joke?"

"It's not," I said. "Alyssa told me about that place."

"Alyssa?" Mark asked. "Who's she?" Of course, there were some things he didn't know about Jessica, Susanne and I. He never knew about the orphanage and I never had the time to tell him about Alyssa. I ignored his question and took the wand out of my pocket.

"How are we all going to get our supplies though? We're broke. We have no money," I said. I hand the wand in my hand tightly even though I had no clue what to do with it.

"Not exactly," Jessica said proudly and smiled. "I have gold from my parents. I have enough for all of us remember," It was the only thing Jessica had left from her dead parents, their money.

"Really," Susanne and Mark said grinning.

"Yeah. But wait a minute. Where are you suppose to get the supplies?" Jessica asked me.

"Diagon Alley I think. I remember Alyssa telling me that and Kayla use to live very close to there."

"Who's Kayla?" Mark asked more confused than ever and usually he isn't the confused one which made it cute.

"We need to reply buy July 31 and it's already July 29." Jessica pointed out.

"How do we get it back to them?" Suzanne wondered.

"Owls," I said. "They delivered these letters to us so that's how they'll get back," I replied simply.

All of a sudden an owl landed where the letters were and had a pen in its mouth. We wrote back, accepting the offer. The great horned owl grew fond of Suzanne and she kept petting it. When Mark tried to pet the owl almost snapped at him. Jessica laughed and Mark only sighed.

"When should we go to Diagon Alley? And more importantly where is it?" Jessica asked. The great horned owl flew away.

"Let's go tomorrow," I suggested putting the supplies list in my other jeans pocket. "I think I remember where it is."

Mark had to leave and Jessica went inside. Suzanne and I stayed outside for a little while longer. We were excited and yet speechless.

"Do you think," Suzanne said slowly. "Your brother is at Hogwarts?"

I didn't even realize that until she brought it up. I wasn't in the mood to talk about him. "I dunno, he might be there," I said, not sounding excited at all.

"But maybe you can find out your past. You can find your family," Suzanne said brightly and hopefully.

"It would be odd after eight years," I pointed out. "And what happens if they don't want me," I said bitterly and sadly. It was a terrible thought but it was possible. I thought who would want me now?

"Don't think like that," Susanne scolded. "They would love you,"

"I'm worried," I admitted. "Excited but worried," I wished so much to see my family again and now there was a chance, but the thought of rejection haunted me for the rest of the summer.

* * *

Author's Note: Review please! Magical brownies for all! Review! It's good for you! 


	11. A Reunion

Author's Note: Hi everyone. Thanks for reviewing. It's good for you and the author's self esteem rises from it. Two good things happen! Squee for that.

**Drummer Chick13: **One magical brownie for you! Thanks for reviewing!

**The Demon Inside**: Another magical brownie for you. Thank you for reviewing! Yes she will meet Remus. How can I hide that any longer.

**KRP: **Thanks for reviewing. looks at mistake haha yeah thanks for pointing that out. Um that whole thing about Remus and Rachel meeting is going to happen in this chapter. Hope you had a nice time on your trip!

**Lord Fury:** Thanks for reviewing. Review again. Glad you like it.

Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

People looking frantically for their platform; luggage, suitcases making different sounds as their owners pulled them around. Four very excited but parentless children were looking for a platform that seemed like it didn't exist. Haha that's us. The four parentless children. We were all walking back and forth to find Platform 9 ¾ . It was no where to be found. 

"Where can it be?" I said frustrated lugging a cart with all my possessions.

"I dunno. There are only platforms nine and ten," said Suzanne and sighed.

"Maybe they printed the ticket wrong or something," Jessica said looking at the ticket oddly.

"Hey there's a guy over there," Mark pointed to a man in a uniform. "Maybe he knows." He walked away and asked. He came back with a shrug on his shoulders.

"He called me crazy," Mark said dully.

"Well that's lovely," Jessica said sarcastically. I noticed two boys with the Hogwarts crest on their trunk and it looked liked they knew where they were going.

"Let's follow them," I pointed to the boys. "They look like they know,"

We quickly caught up to them to find where the platform was. At first we couldn't believe what they did.

"You got to be kidding me!" Jessica and Suzanne exclaimed. The boys one at the time went through the wall which was between platform nine and ten and disappeared.

"So you go through the wall?" I said out loud, unsure. It seemed too strange.

"Yeah," I voice said. It belonged to a girl who was older than us with auburn hair and pretty green eyes.

"Um thanks," I said quietly. We went through the wall one at a time. It seemed like we were on another secret platform of some sort. A big train stood before me called The Hogwarts Express. Something told me this was going to be one of the strangest year I will ever have.

* * *

"It seems really crowded so I guess we'll have to split up," Jessica said. 

"Ok," Suzanne, Mark and I said in unison.

"We'll meet up when we get there,"

"Ok see ya," I watched as my friends went in different directions and I kept walking.

"Ha-ha I beat you James," I heard a voice say. Being the very curious person I was I followed that voice. Their compartment door was open so I peaked in without them noticing.

There was one boy with uncontrollable black hair with glasses over his hazel eyes. He was playing exploding snap with another with jet black hair and these beautiful grey eyes. The other boy in the compartment was reading. His amberish looking color (kinda on the brown side) eyes were stuck in a book and his light brown hair sometimes got in his way.

"Come on Remus. Don't you wanna play?" James who was the boy with the glasses asked.

"No thanks," the boy replied.

"_That's Remus. There aren't too many kids with that name. It's an odd name." _I thought to myself. I became really anxious and my heart started to race.

I knocked on their compartment door and that was the first time they noticed I was there. "Excuse me," Their faces were looking at me. "Can I sit here please?"

"Well sure," replied the boy with the grey eyes. "I'm Sirius. No seriouly I'm Sirius."

"That joke isn't funny. I'm James Potter," the boy with the crazy hair introduced himself. "And that's Remus Lupin. Hey Remus this is… wait who are you? You aren't in our year,"

"Oh I'm Rachel… Rachel Lupin," Sirius started staring at me and Remus closed his book.

"Did you say you were…" Remus started to say but James cut him off.

"I gotta find Evans," James walked away from us. Sirius got up too.

"I'm going with him. He has a huge crush on this girl Lily Evans and likes to annoy her. So I'll help him," Sirius rambled and left. "Explain to us later ok?" he mumbled to Remus and left quickly.

"Remus is a very unusual name," I said, having no clue what to say after Sirius left. "And so is the last name Lupin,"

"You can't be her," Remus said. "They say you were dead."

"What do you mean by 'they'?" I asked curiously.

"The people who took you," He said and got a little bit paler than he looked before. I just realized that he was very skinny, almost as thin as I was.

"I remember that… sort of," I replied. I started to explain everything that happened. From the orphanage to Alyssa. When I finished telling him I asked, "Tell me what I missed. Please tell me,"

He gave a long sigh and explained everything. Almost everything.

"So those men were our father's friends," It stuck me, the man who gave me the piece of paper wasn't one of those men. "The guy who gave me the piece of paper was our father,"

"But when Mum and I went one time he said you starved yourself," Remus explained. He went into further detail.

"So why would he want me to escape?"

"I don't know. This is all going so quickly. All of a sudden you come back and now you want to know practically everything!" There was silence. "Sorry, around this time of the month I can overreact sometimes," After that comment I was very confused. "Time of the month?" Odd, but after the look I gave him he explained more. He told me about lycanthropy and his transformantions. It was hard to believe he was a werewolf. He didn't act like the one. He wasn't evil, or dangerous (or at least not at that moment). He didn't fit the werewolf descirption. I guess not all werewolves are bad. It's a shame other people don't realize this.

"Just tell me about mum," When I would fall asleep every night I would try so hard to picture her. "Do you remember anything about me when I was little?"

"You'll have to meet her at Christmas," he told me. "I really don't remember anything at all about you," he said sadly. "I forgot what life was like before the bite. I mean I've heard stories and seen pictures."

"Do your friends know about…"

"Yeah they figured it out last year," He answered

"Wait a minute you mention something about Romulus. Where is he?" I asked and Remus gave a bitter laugh.

"That bastard," he said harshly. Even though I met him it seemed liked he never sweared unless it was something very bad. "He's with his Slytherin friends. I still can't believe I have such a self centered cousin like that. He hates me for being what I am."

"Seems like an ass" I commented. The scenery that was outside was so beautiful and calm and everything seemed great. "So you like Hogwarts. When I got my letter I had no clue what it was,"

"It's excellent," He exclaimed. "It's something you would never imagine,"

"Well that was sure amusing," we turned around and heard James' voice and Sirius' laughter.

"Evans will never like you James. Especially for what you did to Snape,"

"I thought I did a very good job," James acted offended.

"I mean the prank was good, but Evans was sure mad," When they reached the compartment there was that strange silence that got really annoying after a while.

"How's Lily?" Remus asked

"Mad at James," Sirius grinned. "We ran into Snivellus,"

"Do we really need to explain," James said and sat right next to me.

"Where's Peter? I thought he would have found us by now," Remus said.

"We didn't see him," replied James trying to fix his hair but failed.

"So Rachel," Sirius said "You're Remmie's little sister huh? How come we never saw or heard about you?"

"You two look like brother and sister… sort of," James said suddenly. "Rachel's hair is just a bit darker than Remus'. And your eyes are different."

"It's a long story why," I replied and crossed my legs like Jessica always does on the seat and I told them my story that was untold for so many years.

* * *

"This is so cool!" Suzanne and Jessica exclaimed. We were on a boat in awe of the sight of Hogwarts, this castle that was so old but so amazing and magical. 

"Yeah it is," Mark said holding the lantern. "It's huge!"

"It's just like he said it would be. Something that I would never imagine."

"What?"

"You found Remus!" Suzanne said happily. "That's great! What's he like?"

"You have to meet him." I said. I looked at my reflection in the water and lanterns and lights were around me. "This is truly amazing,"

* * *

I was still taking in the atmosphere when we were in the Great Hall. Professor McGonagal led us in and all of the first years were in a straight line. The other years were at four long tables. It was decorated beautiful and it was amazing how candles were floating and the night's sky was the ceiling. 

"When I call your name come up here and you'll be sorted," said Professor McGonagal. "Adams, Suzanne,"

Jessica elbowed her and Suzanne walked up quickly to the hat. It was obvious that she was nervous. The hat was placed on her head, it seemed like forever.

"HUFFLEPUFF!" the hat exclaimed. Suzanne sighed in relief and walked over to her house.

A couple of names passed and then it was Jessica's turn.

"GRYFFINDOR!" the hat shouted when it was her turn. She walked over to the table where my brother and his friends were sitting.

"Lupin, Rachel,"

I walked up to the stool where the hat was and it was placed on my head.

**Well, well, well. I didn't know there was another Lupin. You're not your bother's kind. I wonder which house I should put you in.**

_Not Slytherin, anything but that please. I don't want to be with Romulus._

**You might be good in Slytherin you know. You do have some of your father's traits.**

_NO I DON'T! I SAID NO SLYTHERIN!_

**You don't need to get like that. You aren't a Hufflepuff. Loyalty isn't your strength.**

_I'm very loyal to my friends for your information._

**You wouldn't be a good Ravenclaw either. You wouldn't be as smart as the rest of them.**

_Hey! I happen to be smart. Then where do I belong._

**You seem brave. Stubborn but brave. **

"GRYFFINDOR!"

I smiled and walked quickly over to the Gryffindor table. Remus saved me a spot and Jessica was across from me.

"Congratulations," Remus whispered

"Thanks," Jessica was smiling, something that was rare.

Little time passed and it was Mark's turn.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Mark's smile was bold and he came over to us.

"This is great!" he said in a quiet tone because the sorting was going on. " But Suzanne isn't with us,"

"I think she'll be fine," I looked over at the Hufflepuff table and saw her with a group of girls. She waved and smiled. I smiled back having a great feeling.

"You're right Remus," I said to him during the feast. "This place is amazing,"

I never saw so much food in my life. Mark took a plateful of chicken with satisfaction and I took more food than I could eat. Jessica had two plates filled with delicious food.

"It will only get better," he told me

Author's Note: I couldn't find an end to this chapter! Review please. Magical chocolate chip cookies for all!


	12. Homecoming

Author's Note: Hello again! School has started and now I'm sad.

**The Demon Inside**: Hahah not a lot of time actually. Thanks for the review.

**KRP: **Awww sorry about your trip. Thanks for reviewing. I love the shorting hat part and Rachel is annoying it. It was amusing to write.

**ckontowderdon32**: Thanks and I underdtand. It wasn't dramatic. I know that. I was afraid that I would make their reunion cheezy. I might edit it later on. Thanks for you input and the review.

**Drummer Chick 13:** You're welocme. You actually had real chocolate chip cookies that I put into a Victoria's Secret Box which became the Acronym Box (long story to the other people reading this and are wondering what I'm tlaking about!). Thanks for the review!

Oh yes I meant to ask this: Do any of you guys have LJ (Live Journal)? If yes do you know how to post fanfiction on there. If you know please email on the email on top of my pro please. Thanks.

Enjoy!

* * *

Remus was right (again… he always is… well most of the time) that Hogwarts only got better as time went by. The classes were very interesting (except History of Magic which I always fell asleep in). We were in Potions class with the Slytherins. Jessica, Mark and I were a group to brew a potion. 

"So we have History of Magic after this right?" Jessica asked while Mark and I kept putting random ingredients in.

"Yeah I think so," Mark stopped what he was doing and looked at the ingredients. "Um Rachel,"

"Yes," My mind was floating somewhere that didn't care about potions.

"Don't put that ingredient in," he warned me.

"Why not," I accidently put it in anyway.

"'Cause it will…" Mark never finished his sentence and backed away. The cauldron started to change color. First it was green and then it turned a hot pink and started overflowing.

"Dang!" I ran away from the cauldron. I heard the Slytherins chuckling, while their potions were perfect.

"What's going on?" Professor Slughorn exclaimed. He muttered a spell and the mess was gone. "Who would add pink bubbling powder to this potion? It suppose to be a dark blue color."

"So that's why it turned pink," Mark mumbled. The class didn't respond to the Potions Master's question. Instead he looked at me.

"Miss Lupin," he said.

"What is it Professor?" I acted as innocent as possible, even though he knew it was me. It was obvious.

"You are just about as worse in potions as your brother is," he spat. "And I thought that wasn't possible. The directions we clearly written on the board and put in very simple terms,"

"Well sir," Mark spoke up. "It was a complicated potion..."

----

"I don't like him and his crystalized pineapples.," whispered Jessica as we walked to our next class. We passed Remus and Sirius along the way.

"I see you came from potions," Remus commented.

"How did you…"

"There's only one teacher that you can associate with pineapples," he smiled. "So I took a pretty good guess,"

"You're bad at potions too?" I asked knowing the answer. "I thought you were smart and knew everything,"

"I don't know everything," Remus said being modest. Remus is the modest one. "Why would you think that?"

"He's almost done reading the library," Sirius laughed. "So he's getting there,"

"Very funny Sirius." Remus elbowed him . "Most Lupins stink at Potions anyway. So it isn't unusual. Hey something that's normal… See you later. I can't be late for Charms," Remus and Sirius left going in the other direction.

"Off to boring History of magic," Jessica sighed

"You'll take notes for us Mark while were sleeping of boredom right? I just can't focus in that class. Professor Binns is sooo boring. They should get a new teacher,"

Mark seemed to be in his own world. His dark eyes were staring out into space.

"Um Mark…" I said waving my hand.

"Oh sorry. Sure I'll take notes for you," Mark said willingly. "But you guys so owe me. And Rachel, you can never focus,"

"I so can!" No seriously (no pun intended) I can.

"Don't worry Mark," Jessicasaid. We laughed and went off.

* * *

Everything was fine and almost perfect. I still sucked at Potions and History of Magic was still boring. But everything else was great. Defense Against the Dark Arts was pretty interesting and learning how to make things float in Charms kept my mind from wondering. The week before Christmas break a question came towards us. Where are we staying for Christmas Holiday? 

"Well isn't that sort of obvious," The four of us (with Suzanne) discussed this during dinner. We sat at the Hufflepuff table and they gladly welcomed us. "We would stay here." Suzanne said while taking food to her plate.

"Why would we wanna go back there?" Jessica said with hate. "Hogwarts is better than where we use to live," She took a large bite out of her chicken.

"She has a point there," agreed Mark and drank his pumpkin juice.

"Wait a minute. Rachel, are you going with Remus?" Suzanne asked.

"I dunno," I replied. I really had no clue where Remus was going and the same thing went for me.

"You should go if he's going to his home," Suzanne said with an excited tone. She always seemed happy for me when it had to do with finding out more about my family. Maybe she secretly wished she was reunited with her mum and dad and wanted the best for me.

"Yeah," Jessica agreed.

"I'll ask him today," I left the Great Hall and was thinking of places to find Remus.

_"Well the library that's for sure… ouch!" _While I was in my own world I bumped into the older kid.

"Watch where you're going mudblood!" he spat. The boy looked like he was in Remus' year, but a Slytherin and I learned quickly that being with (or talking to one) wasn't a good idea.

"Sorry. You were running." I replied in an annoyed tone. I didn't realize that he had a friend right next to him or otherwise I wouldn't have acted the way I did. "I'm not a mudblood for your information," I said in a stronger tone. The boy who I bumped into had black greasy hair and this strange looking nose. He looked like a creep.

"Wait a minute," said his friend. "Who are you?" This boy had darker hair than I did and blue eyes. He looked a little bit like Remus just taller and not very pale and thin.

"Why is that your businesses?" I said harshly. "Well, if you must know my name is Rachel Lupin. Who are you?"

"Interesting," the boy who asked me my name. "I'm Romulus,"

"She's related to you!" said the oily haired boy. "You both have the same last name,"

"_My last name is Wexler, not Lupin_," Romulus hissed. I found out later that the greasy haired boy was Severus Snape. "I'm defiantly not like my cousin," He seemed like a big snob from just meeting him the first time.

"Your cousin hangs out with Black and that Potter kid," Snape pointed out obviously. "There is something wrong with him," Romulus had a smirk on his face. I was wondering if Romulus would blab about Remus' secret or not. He probably sweared not to tell but he seemed like the type who thought he was better than promises. I glared at Romulus for a second.

"Well it was nice to meet you Rachel. Good thing that you weren't dead after all," He had pure sarcasm in his voice and hatred. They walked away quickly and I continued looking for Remus.

I found Remus with Lily Evans studying in the library. I wondered if he liked her or not. Lily left, not noticing that I was waiting for her to leave. I sat across from Remus at the table where he was reading. "You like her?" I grinned. I annoyed Remus like any other little sister would. Which is quite fun even till this day.

"No," he said whispering quickly. "Why were you thinking that?"

"Where I was standing it seemed that you were enjoying yourself," I said matter-of- fact tone. "Do you like any girls here?"

"Why would I tell you," he replied, not wanted to discus this topic anymore. "You didn't come over here to annoy me,"

"You're right. Where are you going for Christmas Holiday? Are you staying here or not?" I forgot that you were suppose to be quiet in a library so the woman who was at the desk kept giving me dirty looks.

"Well first I was going to stay here for Holidays. Now I'm thinking of going home. The full moon is on Christmas Eve and I know you really want to meet mum," He said quietly.

"That's great!" I said happily, ignoring the woman's annoyed looks at me. I lowered my voice. "Well the full moon isn't good. That stinks, the full moon on Christmas Eve."

"I know," Remus said in a sad tone. "But you'll meet mum which is good. I have to go. See you later,"

* * *

The week passed very quickly. It was snowing, like the first Christmas with Alyssa. It was beautiful. It was like a scene from a story book and the snow was untouched and perfect. The train ride was very boring since Remus just wanted to read and I was impatient and too anxious. 

"Remus!" someone called. A woman walked over with medium length brown hair wearing a simple robe. But there was something about her that was beautiful. Almost like a goddess.

"Who's that?" I muttered. I didn't think it was mum since she didn't look like us.

"It's Aphrodite," he replied. "It's great to see you," he said to the woman and hugged her.

"Great to see you too," Aphrodite said looked at me. "Who are you?" But she didn't say it rudely. She had a sweet, loving tone in her voice.

"Rachel Lupin," I said.

"Really!" She gave me a big hug. She smiled with so much joy. We walked away from the crowd and we were in Aphrodite's old car. "Your mother will be so happy. We all thought…"

"Yes I know," I sighed.

"Where's mum?" Remus asked.

"She asked me to pick you up because she would be at work. By now I think she will be back." Aphrodite replied. "I didn't introduce myself. You probably have no idea who I am. I'm Aphrodite Budd, your mum's friend. I saw you as a little baby and changed a lot of your disgusting diapers!"

"Nice to meet you," I said absentminded and chuckled. "Are we there yet?" We passed by fancy homes, mansions of all sizes. Every mansion was beautiful. I was wondering why we were going through this ritzy neighborhood. We got to the end of the block. The car stopped at this old mansion that looked run down. It seemed to have beauty like all the others before something terrible happened. Then, I understood completely.

"This is home," Remus mumbled. He looked a little embarrassed and ashamed. We were inside and it was kept neat, but nothing fancy. It was simple, trying hard not to fall and show it was in need.

"It's not so bad," I said. I wondered what this mansion looked liked when I was younger. Were we actually rich?

"Diana?" Aphrodite called, putting her bag on the kitchen table. "Remus is home,"

The sounds of footsteps were heard from the long staircase. The women that approached was the mother I wanted to meet for so long. Her light brown, graying hair was tied back in a ponytail. She looked exhausted and her complexion was very pale.

"Remus!" she said happily and gave him a warm hug. "I'm so glad," Remus was delighted to see her too. I was standing next to Aphrodite. She cleared her throat and got her friend's attention.

"I think you'll be VERY happy about who else came too," Aphrodite walked away and took Remus with her.

My mother had a shocked but yet scared look on her face. She had those strange eyes (like Remus) which were wide with amazement right now. It seemed that life wasn't easy for her for a long time. Her son was bitten and her husband left her. I was taken away along with money, love and a good life was snatched from her.

"This can't be," she said hoarsely, trying to hold back tears. "I missed you so much. I thought I would never see you again." She touched my face to make sure that this was real and I wasn't a ghost or some illusion. "I just can't believe this," She held me for awhile on the ripped up couch in the living room. I think she couldn't believe that this was happening. Mum started to cry her salty tears and she held me in her arms. This time it wasn't because she was upset, it was because of joy.

* * *

Author's Note: Yay! Happy! Review! 


	13. Gifts and Curses

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews. Sorry I haven't updated... VERY busy! Enjoy.

* * *

One late night, it was a few days before the full moon I listened into an interesting conversation. Well, parts of it were. 

"How could he!" Aphrodite exclaimed. "That bastard lied to you!"

"Lower your voice," my mother said softly. "I know he lied. And yes I'm very angry at him. I wish John could just go away. I just can't belive she's here. Alive and well. I wonder what happened. Where she was living and all. I should of looked more. Oh Aphordite I feel horrible now! I'm a terrible parent."

"Don't say that! You did you're best. You don't know where she ranaway to. You did the best you can do. And now she's back. You're a great parent Diana. I mean most parents wouldn't do what you did." What Aphrodite meant about that was that Diana didn't abandon Remus when he was bitten (like most parents did at that time sadly).

"Yeah I guess. I don't know. I'm so tired. So you're staying here tonight I guess?"

"Why would I leave? Christmas is coming and why would I want to go home? There's no one back at my place. No cats to take care of,"

"You're thinking of becoming a cat lady? Oh Aphrodite too many surprises in a day!" Diana laughed.

Aphrodite laughed. "I know where my guest room is. Good night,"

"Night,"

That was my cue to go back to run back into my room. It was a plain looking room. I didn't have time to decorate. I looked outside and the moon was almost full. A bit of the moon was gone but tomorrw it would be full for sure. I sighed and crawled back into bed.

* * *

I wandered though the mysterious mansion with so many doors ajar leading to more clues. I had so many questions and not enough time for them to answered. The day of the full moon I walked passed a new room I never saw before. There was some furniture surrounded by dust. One of the pieces that caught my eyes was a small bed with faded pink bedding. Some teddy bears were lying on the bed. The walls were also a different shade of pink. 

Then it hit me. This _was_ my room… the room so innocent and child like. On the wood dresser there was a picture of John and a younger me. He was giving me a piggy back ride and I was laughing and waving to the camera.

"He really did love you," said a voice behind me. I jumped around to see mum. Her robes were worn out and she looked so tired.

"This was my room wasn't it?" I said dumbly aloud

"Yes it was. I kept your furniture because I thought. There was a chance that I could get you back. I didn't want to believe that you were dead…." Her voice trailed off. "Then as the years passed I kept the stuff I couldn't bear to sell or part with in this room. No one comes in here except for me sometimes to think," Diana went to one of the drawers in the wood dresser. She picked up a gorgeous ring. It had a large diamond in the middle and two rubies on the size, but it wasn't ostentatious, it was elegant.

"This was my engagement ring. Another thing I couldn't part with…" she sighed and then took out another ring. It wasn't as large as the other ring but it was still as beautiful. Instead of a diamond or a ruby it was just a simple pink stone ring. "John gave me so much jewelry. These are the only two pieces left."

"Oh," I said. I looked inside the dresser to find some adorable picutres of John and Diana and their friends that haven't been opened in ages. "Can I have this stuff please?"

"I was planning on giving you one of the rings. I thought Remus could use the other one to give to a girl if he ever got married." She said the last line with hope. "Oh but that other stuff, sure you can have it. Might have a lot of dust though,"

"OK thanks," I hugged her tightly. "Thanks for the chat!" I ran out of the room carrying three heavy photo albums.

Most of the pictures were the magic kind (some were the muggle kind since the people didn't move). There was Diana with her best friends at Hogwarts. I met only one of them--Aphrodite. On the back of the picture someone who has messy handwriting wrote "Diana, Athena, Hera and Aphordite in their 5th year." The girls were waving, their smiles bright. A few pictures later was a younger verison of mum with a good looking man holding her. "Diana and John (18)." Only one picture later was Diana again but this time in bed holding a baby boy and trying to not be seen with the camera and John is grinning. "Diana, John and their new baby boyRemus John." The same messy handwriting was on the back of most pictures.

"Rachel dinner!" Aphrodite called. I had no clue that I spent all this time looking at photos.

"Coming!" and I ran down to find Diana cooking and Remus and Aphrodite sitting at the kitchen table.

"Did you enjoy looking at the photos?" asked Diana handing out plates with food... yum.

"Yeah." I said. "It was interesting seein you as a teenager. Very pretty, both of you were. I saw most of Remus' lovely baby pictures. Nice naked bath tub one." I grinned. Usually if it wasn't close to the full moon he would of reacted and maybe laughed but no that didn't happen. His head was on the table and asleep.

"Remus! You need to eat before you go into the basement!" Diana poked him and he eventually woke up.

"No thanks." he yawned. "Can I sleep?"

"You need something in your stomach Remus," Aphrdoite said.

"Sure. Fine. Whatever. I think I'm going to go to the basement a bit earlier ok. Bye," Remus could be how do I say... very moody before the full moon.

"Ok then,"

Diana made this really good chicken. It was nice to have food that was acutally cooked and not frozen foods that you put in a mircowave thing.

"This is sooo good!" I said.

"Glad you like it." said Diana happily.

"Is Remus always that moody?" I asked and took a sip of water.

"Yeah, but more moodier than ever." Diana exclaimed.

"He's 13 now that's why." said Aphrodite. "He's a teenager now and most teens can be a bit moody."

"Like Athena," smiled Diana

"Athena is another story," Aphrodite laughed. "She had her own catagory of moodiness."

"What happened to her?" I asked.

"She died," said Diana "She had a muggle boyfriend and they both died in a car accident,"

"Oh that's terrible," I said. Aphrodite gave Diana a look and Diana gave her that look back.

"Since Remus is down there early I should go down and lock the door." Diana said. She took some chicken on plate to see if he changed his mind.

"Can I come with you?" I asked.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah."

I followed Diana to the basement. The basement had this cave like creepy feeling. We stopped at this sturdy metal door. It had to big locks that you can only lock from the outside. Diana opened the door to find Remus lying on the floor.

"Hey," he said looking at the ceiling.

"Here's some food if you want it," Diana said and handed him the food.

"Thanks," Remus said and had a few bites. "It's almost time. You should really go."

Diana gave him a hug and wished him luck (which yes he needed). We walked out of the small room and Diana locked the two locks.

"Can you hear him from here?" I asked.

"Yes and you can hear the howls from most parts of the house," my mother replied sadly

A little while later I heard it. Oh it was horrible. Even now if we don't have a Wolfsbane potion it's so terrible to hear the screams and howls.

"Why you stupid moon why?" I asked it. I was in my bedroom sitting on my window seat. It gave me no reply (if it did then we should worry) it just kept shining back at me.

* * *

Please review. 


	14. Unreachable

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews! Sorry I took forever. I would like more but I can't complain. This chapter jumps a few years. It starts out when Rachel's in her second and the chapter ends in her thrid year.

**ckontowderdon32**: Thanks for reviewing. Read "Curse of the Wolf" for more info. and I don't know I just like the goddesses names.

**KRP:** Thanks. That's not how Athena died. Diana and Aphrodite lied to Rachel.

**Drummer Chick13: **Thanks for reviewing. I already told you what I want to say via IM. You're awesome (all of you reviewers are too...)

Happy New Year and happy (late) Xmas and Hanukkah and Holiday Enjoy!

* * *

­­­­­­­­­Life became better and better for me as the years went on. I spent all the holidays at my mum's house and sometimes my friends would come along too. My mother tried to spoil me when I came. We went shopping and did all the girl things she couldn't do with Remus. It was lovely. There was no other word to descibe it. 

My crush for Mark faded at the end of my first year at Hogwarts. Why? I thought at first but then another crush came along. Love is a crazy thing. It hits you in the head and you aren't even prepared for it to happen. In the middle of my second year I thought Sirius Black was the hottest guy ever to walk into Hogwarts. But didn't most girls think that? Yeah they did. Even in his fourth year some older girls (but mostly younger) wanted him. Sirius was so clever, mischievous, hot and attractive, but the chances of me and him were slim at the time.

"Remus," I walked up to my brother one day in my second year in the common room. He was doing DADA homework. "Does Sirius have a girlfriend?" I asked. What did I have to lose?

"You like him." Remus stated like a fact. "It's obvious." He was using my technique to irritate me. He still does that to this day.

"Remus!" I said annoyed. "Does he or does he not have a girlfriend?"

"Yeah he does. He has had about five this year and three last year," he replied (I'm still not sure if Sirius really **did** have five girlfriends that year...), sounding annoyed and quickly writing down something on a piece of parchment. "And besides, I wouldn't want my younger sister to hook up with one of my best friends. You're too young right now," Not that ever stopped me but he did have a point.

"Why wouldn't you want that mother?" I teased "If we get married you guys will be related," I pointed out, but it was hopeless.

* * *

In my third year a fifth year Ravenclaw named Aaron Walker and I went out for a date at Hogsmeade. That's what started it all. He was very good looking. He had unusual dirty blonde hair, which was curly and even more out of control than James' hair. His hazel orbs were beautiful. 

For half of the school year we were a couple. I was the one who dumped him.

"We need to talk Aaron," I said outside the Great Hall.

"What is it?" he asked in concern and kissed me.

"I think we should see other people," I suggested.

"What are you talking about?" he said in shock and had some anger in his tone.

"Well, I don't want to rush things and you want something that I'm not ready for. Look Aaron, you're a great guy and all but it's not working," I explained. Aaron was just glared at me. He grabbed my wrist, trying to drag my thin body to an empty classroom. I kicked him and he didn't back down.

"Walker!" a voice shouted. "What the hell are you doing to her?" It was Sirius. I still liked Sirius deep down. I always will.

"Let go of my sister," Remus was right next to Sirius, along with James.

"I don't want anything to do with you anymore," I said forcefully to Aaron and broke away from him.

"Don't touch her." Remus growled. He still is an over protective brother.

"Or we'll hex you to another dimension," said Sirius, seriously.

Aaron gave them dirty looks and left. "One day I will make you mine Rachel. I _will_ have you. And you'll eventually_ have_ to give in," he threatened. "And your brother's friends won't be there to get you out of it," he muttered and left.

"Thanks," was the only thing I could say to the Marauders. I sighed in relief.

"He's a git," James said. "Never liked him,"

"Did he want you to have sex with him?"Remus asked, disgusted.

"Yeah."

"Bastard,"

"They'll be a surprise package tomorrow for him," smirked James. The next day Aaron thought he got chocolate frogs but when he ate them he swelled up and zits attacked his face. It was some sight to see. Very amusing.

"He won't be in your way anymore," Sirius said boldly to me. "No one messes with Moony's sister!"

I blushed a bright red. "Aww…um I'll see you guys later."

I was running toward the common room when again I bumped into who other than Severus Snape.

"Watch where you're going Lupin," he spat.

"Watch where you're going Sev," I said. Whenever I called him (since second year) Sev he would be pissed off at me. He was even more angry at that name than what my brother's friends would call him.

"Don't call me that," he muttered.

"What Sev? I didn't hear you." I laughed. I wasn't afraid of him.

"Just go away. You're so annoying," he muttered.

"Fine. Bye Sev," I giggled. Bothering him to this day is always fun.

When I got to my room no one was there. Jessica must of been with Mark and Suzanne and I was too tired to find them. The other two girls who shared a room with Jessica and I were Jasmine and Beth who we really never talked to. They were out and about doing whatever.

I bounced onto the bed and stared at ceiling for a long time. The thought of Aaron's threat was making me nervous. Why was he acting like this? I thought to myself. He use to be so kind and sweet.  
I sighed and tried to fall asleep but all the images going through my head were Aaron, Snape's face and howling wolves.

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Author's Note:: dramatic music:: Sorry for the odd ending. What will happen next? Review to find out! 


	15. Never Ending Sleep

Author's Note: Hey thanks for the reviews! Sorry I took forever to update. Been very busy, sorry.

Drummer Chick 13: You can use that phrase. I know isn't it a lovely one. Thanks for reviewing!

ckontowderdon32: Thank you thank you thank you!

KRP: Yeah I did skip a few years. The guy (Aaron) is a creep. That's my view on it. I really don't think he's much importance now. I don't think we'll see him agian.

victoria: Thanks for reviewing.

Kiyoumaofthemoon: Thanks for reviewing. I'm glad that you loved it.

Enjoy! It's not a happy chapter. : drama music:

* * *

The beginning of the summer going into my 4th year was amazing. The end of it, were the worst days of my life. Everything was starting to work out. I had a loving family and very loyal friends. My life was the best it ever was and I thought it was perfect (or as close as it could be). Until that day we were told the horrible news. 

Remus and I were at the Potter's and Sirius was there too. We stayed for almost that whole week. It was the third to last week before school started. Then the fourth day before breakfast Aphrodite was in the living room with Mr. and Mrs. Potter. Aphrodite looked horrible! Her face (which was usually beautiful with makeup) was bruised with dried blood and she looked terribly pale. She looked like she was about to pass out.

"Aphrodite what's wrong?" Remus asked. James, Sirius, Remus and I saw them as we were about to walk into the kitchen.

She started to cry and told us that our mother was killed only hours ago by people who call themselves "Death Eaters."

"What!" I exclaimed. "No you're wrong!" I yelled. I didn't notice then that Remus left the room and went back upstairs. "She can't be dead." my eyes watered up. I didn't even know that Sirius was embracing me while I cried.

The rest of the day was a blur. I also went back upstairs and found Remus lying on his bed staring at the ceiling. You could tell that he was just crying. There were dry tears all over his face. I decided to lie down next to him. He embraced me also. We didn't speak. Just silence.

"Remus," I eventually said. "What's going to happen to us now?" I asked worried.

"I have no clue," he said. His voice was horase. "Maybe we could live with Aphrodite. I don't know." He hugged me again and went into the bathroom.

From outside I heard Remus' cries. Not even in front of me he was able to cry. He always had to be alone with this kind of things. Only one person ever saw him so vulerable but I'll explain that later. Much later.

We had to pack up our things and move to Aphrodite's apartment. This was our new home. It was a big apartment but smaller than Lunar Drive.

"Welcome," said Aphrodite. "You two can pick out of three rooms."

Remus and I didn't talk for ages. We stayed on our rooms and isolated ourselves. I came out of my room once in a while but Remus never did. Only to go to the bathroom (I hope). The only time I talked to him was at the funeral but I really do not want to talk about that time.

Aphrodite and I ate dinners together and Aphrodite just put Remus' meals in front of his closed bedroom door.

"He happens to have your mother's room when she lived here." said Aphrodite one night at dinner

"She lived here?" I was surprsied.

"Yes. Also Hera and Athena." she answered. "It was a lot of fun. We were all great friends." she let out a long sighed.

The day after James and Sirius came over to visit.

"We're so sorry," both of them said during hugs.

"I'm glad you guys came." I said.

"Where's Remus?" asked James

"He's been in his room since the funeral." I explained.

"Oh." the two of them said.

"Let's try to get him out of there." said Sirius walking toward Remus' door.

James knocked on the door.

"GO AWAY!" yelled a hoarse voice.

"He's still in there." commented James, "Remus it's us!"

"James and I!" said Sirius

"Of course he knows it's you two." I said. "Dont even bother." I sighed which I was doing a lot of lately (sighing that is...)

"There must be a way to open it." Sirius tried just plainly opening the door but no there was a charm of some sort. Yes we tried the simple spell Alohamora if you thought we were stupid.

I heard Aphordite calling for us and James and I left the hallway to return to the kitchen.

"Where's Sirius?" asked Aphrodite a little after we started eating lunch.

"He was trying to get into Remus' room. Wonder if he got in." answered James taking a big bite of his sandwhich.

We finished our lunch and we were just chatting when Sirius returned but Sirius wasn't the only one to walk into the room.

"Hi guys sorry I took so long," said Sirius casually and Remus following him. There was something different about him. Besides him looking as pale as a ghost and almost as thin as a twig.

We talked a bit more. It was nice and cheered me up from all of Sirius' jokes. But sadly Sirius and James had to leave.

"How did he get you out of there?" I asked Remus later on that night. He was lying on the sofa reading like he always did. He didn't answer.

"What did he do? I would like to know for the future." I said

"We talked. There was chocoalte." he said

"Lie. We tried chocoalte. It didn't work with us."

"It worked with him. Stop asking questions."

"No. Answer. What did he do to you!!" I asked hopelessly but he continued reading his book. Being very annoyed I sighed and made an angry sound and walked out of the living room.

It was only a few months later when I put the pieces of the puzzle together that I knew what _really _happen. And no, there was no chocolate.

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Author's Note: Please review. Sorry if that chapter wasn't the best. I tried to make it somewhat humorous in the end. There will be a sequel to Curse of the Wolf (my other longish fic). That beginning takes place during the beginning of this chapter actually. It will be in Remus' POV (third person) and explain what really did happen between Sirius and Remus in his room. So yeah that's coming soon and review...please. 


	16. Undiscovered

Author's Note: Hi everyone. Yeah I've been busy on my new fic _Starlight._ If you like Sirius/Remus you'll like that fic. So read and review that please. Here's a better chapter...but first thank yous.

**ckontowderdon32:** Thank you for that wonderful advise. I really do appreciate it. I admit myself if I were to rewrite that chapter again it probably would have been better and a lot more emotional. I wrote that chapter during an interesting situation and I didn't accomplish anything that I wanted...besides updating a bit faster. Thank you again for the advise and the review

**Drummer Chick 13: **Thanks for reviewing!!

Enjoy!

* * *

Life went on. Amazing huh? It was during my fourth year at Hogwarts when I met Andrew Fields. One of the most amazing guys that I know. OK maybe not amazing but pretty damn hot. 

We met when I would go to the library. I started to take up a habit Remus did. It calmed me down whenever I was sad: reading. He would always be at the same table as me. He would sometimes have a girl next to him, clinging to his arm. It would upset me a bit even though I knew nothing about him. We never talked. I knew he wasn't in my year. He was older.

His brown, almost curly hair was perfect for his face. It was on the long side, but I didn't mind. His eyes were a light blue. At one point that's all I thought about. Him.

One day, I found him, at our usual table and he looked so sad. Almost depressed. I never saw him look so sad. I took my usual seat across from him.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"April broke up with me," he said. "We've been together since 5th year. I caught her cheating."

"Oh I'm sorry," I was trying to force the tone of concern without showing that I was glad that he was single.

"What's you name?" he asked.

"Rachel Lupin. And yours is..."

"Andrew Fields."

"Lovely to meet you,"

And this was the start of something I would of never imagined. By December we kept spending more and more time together. It was always in secret, which made it somewhat exciting. He was in his seventh and final year. He was in Ravenclaw also. At first he exclaimed to me once "I can't do this! You're way too young!" but he realized that we can work things out.

"I'm sorry I have to leave for Christmas. I wish I could spend it with you," I said to him in an empty classroom right before the Holiday.

"I wish I could be with you too," he said. "Here's something." he then kissed me, right on the lips. He obviously had some practice and me being so unexperienced tried my best and kissed him back with all I had.

"Wow," the only thing that could come out of my mouth. "You're really good,"

"Why thanks. You're not so bad yourself." Andrew grinned. We both got off the desk.

"See you. Happy Christmas," he pulled me into a very tight but loving hug. Did I mention he was a great hugger also.

"See you," and kissed him quickly on the cheek and skipped away like a giggling little school girl.

* * *

Suzanne came with me to Aphrodite's flat for Christmas. Sirius and Remus were there too. They acted a bit funny and I had no clue what was going on. Sirius kept giving Remus weird looks in the car and Remus had a look of embarassment on his face. I decided to ignore it and daydream about Andrew. 

It was two nights before we were about to leave and go back when I saw a very surprising sight. I wanted to talk to Remus about mum. Remus now had her room when she use to live in the flat. I knew that it would be a good time since no one was up.

When I saw Remus and Sirius, almost nude in bed together making out I let out a gasp. It was hard to believe that the guy I liked for so long was with Remus. And didn't Remus like this Hufflepuff girl named Delia?! And Sirius dated almost all the girls in Hogwarts! It was all too weird for me so late at night.

"Why are you up?" asked Suzanne, as I walked back to my room.

"None of your business," I said a bit too harshly. "I mean..." I was going to tell her until she said,

"What's up with you lately? You're always somewhere when we're in school and it always seems like you're hiding something. I and also Jessica and Mark miss you. You're never around anymore. We use to always tell each other things."

"Fine," I said. "Come here," I pointed to my room. "I'll tell you were I've bee lately at Hogwarts." And that's when I told Suzanne everything about Andrew.

"He's older," she said. "But still wow, he really likes you. And you really like him. Did you and him--"

"No," I said. "We kissed,"

"Aw that's cute," she replied. "Does Remus know?"

"Of course not!" I said. "I wouldn't want him too. And besides I think he's hiding something from me so it's only fair. I don't want him to ruin my fun and I won't ruin his."

"Wait. Is he with anyone? Who is she?"

"No comment," I said. "Oh it's so late," trying to change the subject. I yawned. "I need sleep. Goodnight Suzanne."

"Night," and she walked away.

* * *

The next morning at breakfast I was the first one up and attempted to make waffles. Then Remus walked into the kitchen with only a long nightshirt. 

"Morning," I said. "Had fun last night?"

"What did you say!" he said.

"Nothing. Want some waffles?" I gave him a plate of burnt waffles and grinned.

"Not if you poisoned them," but he still took the plate and started to eat them.

"Hello Rachel, Remus," Sirius walked in next. His hair was sticking out in all different angles which looked adorable I have to admit. He only wore shorts which made me have really awkward thoughts.

"Morning,"

"Almost perfect waffles," Sirius took a plate and sat down right next to Remus. "Thanks Rachel."

We ate in silence after that. The vivid image of the two of them last night in my mind kept going through my mind.

* * *

Author's Note: Review please. I'm off to England so there won't be updates for a bit. But still review!! Thanks. 


	17. Sorry

Author's Note: It's been awhile. I felt like updating. Thanks **bluepillow75** for a kinda motivation for updating (since you reviewed) so thanks. And thanks to **Realilly** too for reviewing. Enjoy.

* * *

It was now January and now we were all consumed with work, work and more work. It was harder for me to see Andrew during this time since he was starting to get a ton of N.E.W.T.S. stuff and my teachers were even starting with O.W.L.S work and preparing us for it!!

But the mental image of Remus and Sirius still floated in my mind every so often. At the time I really didn't know how I felt about homosexuality. So I was very confused. A part of me was upset that Sirius chose Remus (since I still had a little crush on Sirius, even though I was so glad to be with Andrew) but I was happy that Remus was distracting himself.

Andrew and I finally had time to meet up with each other. It was late at night in a classroom and we thought it was in a perfect location where no one would intrude and everything seemed fine. We didn't realized that we forgot to silence the room and lock the door. (We weren't doing anything naughty... we were talking and laughing, kissing.) As a result we were caught after hours.

But it wasn't juts any prefect who caught us... it was Remus.

"Rachel!" Remus exclaimed as he saw me and Andrew in a erm... interesting position. It was just kissing I swear!!

"Oh shit!" I said as soon as I realized what just happened.

" 'Oh shit' is right. What's going on?" asked Remus "What were you doing?"

"None of your business." I said. "This is Andrew. We've been together since--"

"What doesn't matter right now. Why are you with someone who's older than you? A seventh year! You're too young," said Remus who was now offically in overprotective brother mode. "There are many eligible... people who are in your year. And if you thought the whole situation was ok then why did you hide it from me and your friends? What were you--" I couldn't take Remus' annoyance (even though he was kinda right in some ways) so I interrupted.

"You shouldn't be talking," I said. "You and Sirius sleep together! I saw it so you can't deny it. Both of you were naked so don't you dare talk about hiding things. You're so hypocritical!" I exclaimed

"You saw us?" Remus had a look of shock on his face. "It wasn't what you thought."

"You guys never did it?"

"No. But I won't lie to you. Sirius and I are... together."

"Sirius Black?" asked Andrew very suddenly. "I'm just surprised that's all. Since all the girls love him and I didn't expect that. I didn't know that you knew them-- Sirius, James, Remus and Peter. Their pranks are awesome." Andrew said to me.

"This is so strange," I said.

"I can't get you guys into trouble. No matter how awkward this meeting was. You guys should leave before another prefect comes by. But it was still nice to meet you Andrew. But if you do anything to her... then you're in for it." Remus smiled and left

Remus and I discussed that night a week or so later after it occurred. He told me that shortly after that he and Sirius finally told James and Peter about their relationship. I still had so many questions about how it happened and why but I knew that I had to be supportive and accept it. Which I did and the whole situation taught me to be more open-minded.

* * *

A week later after that, the "Willow incident" or "the prank" or whatever the hell you want to call it occurred. During Transfiguration, Sirius came to my class and told McGongall that I had to go to Infrimary with him and that it was important.

"What's going on?" I asked him, knowing that the full moon was yesterday. "What's wrong?"

"I better explain it to you now... since I'll have to tell Remus what happened too."

A little while later I yelled, "You did what! Why!? Were you even thinking?!"

"I thought you wouldn't react that way," Sirius muttered.

"Well imagine how Remus is going to react." Sirius didn't reply and just got really pale.

"Sirius," said James as we walked into the Infirmary. "Remus just woke up. You have to be the one who tells him since it's all our falut."

"I'm so screwed," Sirius said to me. "This will ruin my whole relationship with him." And he was right.  
I wasn't there when Sirius told him. James, Peter and I were outside the curtain (Remus was in the left hand corner and his bed was blocked by a curtain) but we all heard what Remus said.

"YOU'RE SO STUPID!! I COULD HAVE KILLED SOMONE! IMAGINE IF I DID... I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO LIVE WITH MYSELF! YOU DON'T THINK DO YOU!! YOU CAN BE SO SELFISH," Remus was panting since he was still so weak.

"Remus calm--"

"Don't tell me what to do," he snapped. "Go! It's over,"

"No Remus you don't mean--"

"Mr. Black, please leave," Madam Pomfrey exclaimed.

"No," Sirius murmered but obeyed. He left the Hosptial Wing and I could see his eyes were watering with tears that were waiting to come but just not in front of us.

"Madam Pomfrey, " I walked behing the curtain. "May I?"

"Sure," she said and left.

I sat down on Remus' bed and we both didn't say anything for awhile.

"I was really the stupid one," Remus said after awhile. "I trusted him. I really thought he was better than that."

"Don't say that," I said.

"I put too much trust in him,"

"Wait a minute," I said, knowing what he was implying. "Did you two--"

"Yes and a few times," he answered.

"Oh Remy," I moved over next to him and started to hug him.

"You should go Rachel," he said, almost pushing me away. "I'm really, really tired and all."

I left and went back to the Gryffindor common room. I checked on Sirius but he wasn't in his room. He was in bathroom and I thought I heard a sob or two.

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Review!! Please.


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